Recently Ive been reflecting on my past 12+ years in the leather community here in San Francisco. To be clear, specifically the title circuit. I have been reflecting on my past involvement from producing leather contests, to my own title, competitions, and what I want moving forward.
Many people on here are new to my Facebook, my friendships and my existing circle. I stepped away a few years ago when certain people with big egos became unbearable. I got burnt out by those who know the word cordial and use it in every way possible. Disingenuous people who will be nice to you when they want to be but will ignore you when it no longer serves their agenda. In other words, a whole lot of fake.
Recently with my reflection, Im finally remembering why I wanted to be involved and what I originally wanted to get out of it. I’m remembering the feeling of why I did what I did and what I wanted to accomplish before becoming jaded by the few. I allowed those few to change the way I saw things. I became angry at the community as a whole.
Reflecting back now, I remember one person who came up to me and said “You always seem happy. No one can be *that* happy”. I responded by telling them I have issues and problems but I don’t want to be that guy dragging them out with me. Overall though I was happy and smiled a lot. I liked being the happy guy who smiled all the time. Said hello to random strangers and invited those standing alone to join our circle so they felt included.
After growing in myself, and in my leather journey, I realized I loved connecting people. “Oh, you’re into xyz, you should meet my friend xxx”. I enjoyed being a catalyst, or as several have called me a constant. I love watching and helping people grow in themselves. Watching what they become. Who they will be.
One of the reasons I enjoyed all of this so much was that it gave me joy watching people who are truly good people, do something to help themselves and their community. People with big hearts who want to make a difference. I forgot about the genuine and only focused on those who had ill intentions.
Slowly Im coming back around and putting myself out there after being attacked, hurt, and used by several people in the community. I stepped away because I no longer wanted to deal with all of that. I’m putting myself back out there for the right reasons again, remembering who I was, and now stronger for it. I’m stronger for the many who have come into my life and reminded me who I am as a person.
I’m looking forward to the future and appreciate all those friends around me, new and old who have shown me their heart. There are amazing people out there who just want to do good things. Thank you for allowing me to see that in myself again.
– Especially thank you to Chris for allowing me to see it again through a fresh set of eyes and a fresh heart. I am grateful.
Recently Ive been reflecting on my past 12+ years in the leather community here in San Francisco. To be clear, specifically the title circuit. I have been reflecting on my past involvement from producing leather contests, to my own title, competitions, and what I want moving forward.
Many people on here are new to my Facebook, my friendships and my existing circle. I stepped away a few years ago when certain people with big egos became unbearable. I got burnt out by those who know the word cordial and use it in every way possible. Disingenuous people who will be nice to you when they want to be but will ignore you when it no longer serves their agenda. In other words, a whole lot of fake.
Recently with my reflection, Im finally remembering why I wanted to be involved and what I originally wanted to get out of it. I’m remembering the feeling of why I did what I did and what I wanted to accomplish before becoming jaded by the few. I allowed those few to change the way I saw things. I became angry at the community as a whole.
Reflecting back now, I remember one person who came up to me and said “You always seem happy. No one can be *that* happy”. I responded by telling them I have issues and problems but I don’t want to be that guy dragging them out with me. Overall though I was happy and smiled a lot. I liked being the happy guy who smiled all the time. Said hello to random strangers and invited those standing alone to join our circle so they felt included.
After growing in myself, and in my leather journey, I realized I loved connecting people. “Oh, you’re into xyz, you should meet my friend xxx”. I enjoyed being a catalyst, or as several have called me a constant. I love watching and helping people grow in themselves. Watching what they become. Who they will be.
One of the reasons I enjoyed all of this so much was that it gave me joy watching people who are truly good people, do something to help themselves and their community. People with big hearts who want to make a difference. I forgot about the genuine and only focused on those who had ill intentions.
Slowly Im coming back around and putting myself out there after being attacked, hurt, and used by several people in the community. I stepped away because I no longer wanted to deal with all of that. I’m putting myself back out there for the right reasons again, remembering who I was, and now stronger for it. I’m stronger for the many who have come into my life and reminded me who I am as a person.
I’m looking forward to the future and appreciate all those friends around me, new and old who have shown me their heart. There are amazing people out there who just want to do good things. Thank you for allowing me to see that in myself again.
2008 – – My goal for my Mr Hayes Valley Leather year was to be approachable and inclusive to everyone. To show the world that the leather title circuit wasn’t filled with egotistical bullies who only wanted to serve their own selfish agenda. To show the world that there are friendly people out there.
For those who would like to know my background, here it is.
– 2006/2007 – Stop AIDS / Outreach – Sex surveys at Powerhouse
– 2007/2008 – Community Advisor Board to the Kink Community
– 2007 – 2008 – Castro Community on Patrol (inception)
– 2006 – Inception and original member of the K9 Unit
– 2008 – 2009 – Mr. Hayes Valley Leather 2008
– 2009 – Bare Chest Calendar Judge
– 2009 – 2013 – Hayes Valley Leather producer
– 2010 – 2012 – Tally for San Francisco Leather
– 2013 – 2015 – Assistant Producer for San Francisco Leather
– 2013 – Bare Chest Calendar
– 2014 & 2015 – Started Producing the San Francisco Eagle Leather
Other stuff:
* Trailer Trash Shows for various charities
* Mama’s Family (although I don’t acknowledge the group for my own reasons)
* I ran for San Francisco Leather Daddy’s boy 2006 and 2007
* Helped several campaigns and many fundraisers for both the Imperial and Ducal Courts.
* Volunteering for San Francisco Food Bank
* Volunteering for St Anthonys Clothing for the Homeless
* Rebuilding the Presidio to its native wildlife
* Restoring wetlands in Dogpatch
* Volunteered for Project Homeless Connect��